It's William Shatner's 80th birthday. (How did he get so old while the rest of us haven't aged?) A few years back I wrote, at length, on my old Amazon blog about the reasons why I'm an unrepentant, unapologetic Shatnerd—the essay seems to have vanished into cyberspace, so I may re-post it here at some point—but, really, it can all be summed up in two little words: Denny Crane. Of course I love Captain Kirk and the Priceline guy, the unhinged airline passenger who flew through The Twilight Zone, Third Rock's Big Giant Head and the Shakespearean prosecutor of The Andersonville Trial (among many others), but Shatner's portrayal of Boston Legal's legendary lawyer is the role that folded all his personas into one larger-than-life—and yet heartbreakingly human—package. So, in celebration of Shatner entering his ninth decade, here's a little taste of the inimitable Denny Crane.